Wednesday, September 26, 2012


I can only imagine how truly perfect heaven is.  Having Gracen there makes the hope of eternity so much greater for Ryan and I and so many others too.  This year my heart and mind have imagined so much.  When we first found out I was carrying our first child, I imagined all about that sweet life.  The reoccurring prayer I had was for a child who brought much joy to many lives.  I remember praying words like sweet and joyful so very often.   I truly saw a little life who brought big blessing to others.  I would think about children in our lives or that I’ve had in my classroom that were sweet, kind and gentle … and desired a child to bring those blessings to this world.  Some of my favorite days are when Ryan and I are just living life at home.  I love being home and remember imagining those sweet times at home with us and our baby.  The daily routines of raising a child is what I was looking forward to most, and what I miss the most now.  I think about Gracen every day.  We imagine what her favorites would be, what would make her smile, and all the little memories we would be making with her. 

I could have never imagined the joy parents experience welcoming their child into this world.  Words just could never describe it.  The moments we spent with Gracen in our arms were the best moments in our lives.  We are so proud of her.  I could also never have imagined the pain of losing a child and there are still times when it just takes your breath away.  The grace of God has been more this year than we could have ever imagined or understood.  His purpose, His plan, His will is all so good.  We can’t imagine our life without Gracen and God’s perfect plan for her life.

It’s hard for me not to wish we could wake Gracen up from her crib on her first birthday and shower her with balloons… celebrating her with all the fun of a first birthday, and love on her in a million ways.  It doesn’t look exactly how we imagined, but we certainly will be celebrating Gracen Faith, with God as He’s celebrating WITH her!  We won’t get to see her face light up seeing balloons, or trying to open presents, or tasting a cupcake for the first time but we’ll send balloons up to for her and we’ll imagine how amazing it must be to celebrate such a special day in heaven! 

all our love, xoxo


  1. Gracen Faith! I am so honored to know you and your mommy and daddy. You teach me everyday with your BIG life. Love you three soooo very much!

  2. Happy 1st birthday in heaven sweet baby girl. "Auntie" Rebel misses you and loves you!